The leaves start falling with his song.

Some people leave the world and leave behind such a profound trace of inspiration. Sometimes only when you notice that you are never going to see them again, you realize how much they have influenced you. Thanks Karin for leaving your mark. And thank you for this wonderful bookAnd thank you for this wonderful book.


Heard
“I really feel I’m sparkling from the inside but I don’t know where to put it”.
“If you fall I’ll virtually blow on your wound”.
“We had some really boring sad sex. It’s like when you wake up next morning and said Fuck my life, tomorrow It’s going to get better”.
“Some things are not good dry. Cake. Pools. Sex. But tofu is different”.
“You are going to make a great old person. You always take the short step, never waste energy”.
“This is ikea. What do you expect. Everything that is not fried doesn’t taste like anything”.
“Du, ich mache alles gerne für geld. Für Geld kann ich fast alles machen”.

A: The aim of my life is to have grandchildren.
B: Really? But you don’t even have children yet.
A: I know, but I really want to have grandchildren.

“It’s my Robbin to my batperson”.
“I grew up in Ikea”.
“The only thing I have to do in life is to die. Besides that, I don’t have to do anything else, I can do whatever I want”.
“I know that sometimes it is time for me to shine and sometimes it’s time to let other people shine”.
“Art is never finished, only abandoned”.
“If you try to simply control your hatred, then perhaps, the more you try to control it, the more you’ll hate yourself”.
“You can cry.. why don’t you cry? You won’t die of crying”.

I felt sheepish.


Music that found me
Willis Earl Beal - Too Dry To CryWillis Earl Beal - Too Dry To Cry Eric Dolphy - Out To Lunch!Eric Dolphy - Out To Lunch! Johnny Hodges & Wild Bill Davis - Blues For MadeleineJohnny Hodges & Wild Bill Davis - Blues For Madeleine Bessie Smith - Tain't Nobody Business If I DoBessie Smith - Tain't Nobody Business If I Do

and freak musical gems
Susumu Yokota - Acid Mt. FujiSusumu Yokota - Acid Mt. Fuji Yasuaki Shimizu - KakashiYasuaki Shimizu - Kakashi Samsara Blues Experiment - Long Distance TripSamsara Blues Experiment - Long Distance Trip


Books read
James Baldwin.. many of his books. Some of my favorites: “If Beale Street Could Talk”, “Giovannni’s Room”, “Nobody Knows My Name” and “Notes of a Native Son”. The two first books are fiction and the other two are autobiographical. Baldwin taught me so many things about life so far, his teachings are like punches in the face sometimes, some other times are like buckets of cold water and eventually like bright flashes of light. All of the teachings always tell me wake up, wake up, see this, see that.

Ajahn Sucitto, “Kamma and the end of Kamma”. Brilliant book.

A lot of books about creativity and productivity that weren’t really meaningful. Nothing worth sharing.

Some books about writing..
“On writing”, Stephen King.
“The 3 AM Epiphany” (fun writing exercises that reactivated my writing mood)
“Bird by Bird”, by Anne Lamott (constantly rereading this book, it’s one of the best I’ve ever read).
“Catching the Big Fish”, by David Lynch.


Saw
A twenty something year old person kissing their father before running to catch the ubahn.
Long pink nails from the cashier.
A woman buying fish.
A person entering the number 19 but they didn’t live there.
A window with 53 cactus.
Three crows flying over the cemetery.
A pair of abandoned leather boots.
Five chairs abandoned on different streets.
Someone looking at me, looking down the floor and blushing.
A child crossing the street running towards me, asking if he could interview me.
A lot of people pretending to be cool and important.


Random thoughts
I am very frustrated. I wanna cry actually (after spending the whole day in a feature that didnt work!)
That instant when you have a sudden moment of brilliance and solve all the coding challenges of the day (another day, another mood)

Don’t dispair, whatever situation or mood you are currently in, it will go away. Many more doors will be opened, many more opportunities will come and many more meaningful people will show up, even if you don’t see them right now. Just give yourself more love right now, be more tender, more forgiving towards everything you do. It will be alright, everything is gonna be alright.

Apparently I have been cooking tofu the wrong way my whole life.

How weird is to see people in good mood in the train.

Delusion is what people have when they think that Trump will do all the opposite that what he promised in his campaign.

I like the perfume of some people when they clap enthusiastically.